So, last night my family was planning to go out to dinner so that my new boyfriend could meet them. I made the plans with my brother, which apparently weren't good enough for my Mom.
We wanted to meet at 6. But that was too late for my Mom. She complained about how late that was and how there would be a long wait and for whatever reason she was concerned about getting home later than 7. (They were seated right away and there was no wait)
Then she was complaining because I wasn't going to be able to drive her to the restaurant because I was meeting at my boyfriend's and driving from there. She flipped. She is afraid to drive on the highway and kept saying something about not finding a parking spot. She's crazy. I told her that she would need to get over this fear since we won't always be there to drive her around and she was SO mad that I even suggested that. (Oh and by the way, my brother drove her and they found a spot up front, so no need to worry.)
When they (Mom, my brother and his girlfriend) got to the restaurant they were seated right away and they were waiting for us. They called once to tell us they were waiting and I lied and said that we were almost there when really we were still at his house. Another phone call came while we were in transit and it was an angry phone call. She was so mad and snippy. Real nice first impressions.
Once we got to the restaurant, I was really nervous (and upset). The dinner went fine but I'm still annoyed at how she acted.
People need to stop enabling her to be this way. So long as everyone drives her around, she will continue to be scared to drive on the highway. Mom needs to grow up. I don't understand how anyone could get through life with so many fears. My Dad always allowed her to be like that and now that he isn't here, I guess she expects everyone else to do it for her. I refuse to enable her.
Maybe I am a horrible person, maybe I am just mean but I refuse to be her crutch anymore.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Background Check
My Mom's name is Linda. She was born in February 1950. She is the mother of three children, all grown and the grandmother of five children, all my sisters kids.
My Dad died six months ago and Mom is not fully over it yet. She still cries everyday. Though she is hopeful to remarry one day.
She works in a garment factory and seems to like her job even though she complains about it daily. She feels that she is the only one that can do this job even though it is a simple job. She feels the place will fall apart without her, as if the people who own the place don't know how pack the garments.
My Mom is a worry wart and is a very fearful person. She is afraid of the snow...she won't drive in it. She is afraid of driving period and is a very nervous driver. She is afraid of traffic and driving on the highway. She is afraid of running the self-clean on the oven cause it might catch on fire. She is scared of a lot of things and it prevents her from doing things. I feel that she may die with many regrets.
My Mom raised three children and raised them well. She stayed home with us until we were in middle school and made sure that she was home to get us off the bus. My Dad worked nights when we were kids, so he was rarely home for dinner or bed time. My Mom did all of that. I remember we would eat dinner very casually in front of the television. We would play cards or put together puzzles after dinner and she would bake us cookies or make pop corn. It was a fun time.
She was fun to be around, so it confuses me how she turned into such a negative person now. She seems to be negative about everything. This was happening before my Dad passed away. I noticed it when I moved back from Maryland. Maybe I never paid attention before or maybe her negativity has grown over the years but now she is so negative that it is often unbearable to be around. And no matter what you say to spin it positive, it just doesn't work on her.
So this is my Mother's life. Don't get me wrong, I love my Mom. To live with her is to understand (or be confused by) her madness. It's interesting and frustrating. I try to figure it out but it's not worth it. She'll never change. Maybe I'm too old to be living with her. Maybe I've changed. I don't know. I love my Mom.
My Dad died six months ago and Mom is not fully over it yet. She still cries everyday. Though she is hopeful to remarry one day.
She works in a garment factory and seems to like her job even though she complains about it daily. She feels that she is the only one that can do this job even though it is a simple job. She feels the place will fall apart without her, as if the people who own the place don't know how pack the garments.
My Mom is a worry wart and is a very fearful person. She is afraid of the snow...she won't drive in it. She is afraid of driving period and is a very nervous driver. She is afraid of traffic and driving on the highway. She is afraid of running the self-clean on the oven cause it might catch on fire. She is scared of a lot of things and it prevents her from doing things. I feel that she may die with many regrets.
My Mom raised three children and raised them well. She stayed home with us until we were in middle school and made sure that she was home to get us off the bus. My Dad worked nights when we were kids, so he was rarely home for dinner or bed time. My Mom did all of that. I remember we would eat dinner very casually in front of the television. We would play cards or put together puzzles after dinner and she would bake us cookies or make pop corn. It was a fun time.
She was fun to be around, so it confuses me how she turned into such a negative person now. She seems to be negative about everything. This was happening before my Dad passed away. I noticed it when I moved back from Maryland. Maybe I never paid attention before or maybe her negativity has grown over the years but now she is so negative that it is often unbearable to be around. And no matter what you say to spin it positive, it just doesn't work on her.
So this is my Mother's life. Don't get me wrong, I love my Mom. To live with her is to understand (or be confused by) her madness. It's interesting and frustrating. I try to figure it out but it's not worth it. She'll never change. Maybe I'm too old to be living with her. Maybe I've changed. I don't know. I love my Mom.
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